I learned about the terminology “Thirst trap” from my brother the other day. (I still laugh at those words, by the way.) All the brave women coming clean about their sexual assault or harassment experience these past weeks made me, once again, think of this social media–especially Instagram–slang.
There’s this short story I read on Twitter by a woman who, when she was a teenager, was raped by a group of human waste (they don’t deserve to be called men). She never told anyone about what happened and said that she had gotten in a fight when asked about her bruises. My guess is that she never spoke out because of shame. (SHE felt shame, when it should’ve been the other way around.) She said that she only told her mom in recent years, I think in her 30s, and that the first question her mom asked was, “What were you wearing?”
What a chilling response… and to hear it from her own mother. My heart shatters for women like her because there is this incredible amount of pressure and BLAME put on us women, on any victim; there’s this belief in our society that WE are responsible for, not only our behavior but also for men’s behavior. It’s been said a million times, but I’ll say it again: a woman isn’t asking for “it” when she dresses provocatively.
Regardless, no matter the reason for a woman to show a lot of skin, never blame her for the actions a man takes. No one is putting a gun to that man’s head forcing him to do the unthinkable. There’s this thing called SELF-CONTROL and, dammit, common sense?? Practice it! It is men’s responsibility, not ours, to control their “thirsty” selves. Remember that.
Thank you to all the brave women sharing their stories. Keeping quiet only allows for more assaults, sometimes even by the same perpetrator. You are loved, and remember it was not your fault.
So, fellas, are you with me?