The Tradition

I get the tradition. Believe me, I get the tradition. The want and the need to “become one” when you’re in love; the excitement of the “forever” promise when a couple says, “I do.” The search for the perfect dress that comes after for some women… I get it all. 

But I also get that, that thrill, is the result of learned behavior.

We’ve been conditioned to believe that an expensive ring closes the deal; that it proves how “in love” your partner is and that, as a result, you must be “the one” if he/she proposed, right? So cute yet so silly. 

Question is: is it a demonstration of love for you or is it a whole spectacle for the world to see? To prove to society that your relationship is valid? That your love is worth it? 

In the past, I’ve personally been asked, “when is he going to pop the question?” Because it was hard for some people to believe that I never did, nor do I intend to, follow that societal rule. 

Yes, proposals can be cute. So sweet and, oh, so adorable! But, again, we see it that way because it’s just another tradition. And the thing with traditions is we feel compelled to follow through.

The only promise or proof of love I need from a man is his actions — not a shiny object on my finger. Don’t get me wrong; I love diamonds and delicate jewelry and… (I’m just throwing hints out into the void). But my point is I refuse to see a ring as the signature that seals a romantic relationship.

Don’t even get me started on the kinds of debts that people get into to buy the “perfect ring,” just to end up calling off the engagement, sometimes, before the wedding even happens. I don’t mean to burst anyone’s bubble, I just know stories…

I’m just saying, my dear readers. 

To each their own. But there are many ways of proving that she or he is the one. Because in the end, it’s love; not a business contract.